I am soaring high today! After months and months of "negative Ghost Rider, the pattern is full" I finally got clearance for all systems go! (Okay, if you're not a Top Gun fan, then none of that will make any sense to you!) All one or two of you that have been reading my blog, know that I've had this historic home for sale for quite a while...18 months worth of a while. Well, Hallelujah! Praise Jesus! I wrote an offer on it yesterday and it was accepted today! We are scheduled to close the end of this month.
To add to it, I was two years overdue for my mammogram, so I had an appointment today. No, that was not the fun part. And, having her tell me, "oh no, your chin got in the way of that one, we'll have to do it again." What? Come on, lady! I'm not Jay Leno for Pete's sake! Plus, how could my chin get in the way, it's tucked neatly behind my shoulder which is pressed against the back of my knee cap! Seriously, I think I could go and try out to be a contortionist for Ringling Brothers Circus after that little adventure.
Head clown: um, yes, what kind of experience do you have twisting your body into unnatural positions?
Me: annual mammograms.
Head clown: you're hired!
Okay, where was I? I drifted off into storyland for a minute there. Ahh, yes, mammogram. After the 20 minutes of what seemed like an eternity of waiting for results, I got the "everything looks fine! See you in a year." Thank you Lord!
Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go practice stretching and twisting my body in preparation for next year's mammogram. [Schedule your's today!]
13 sweet friends had to say...:
I LOVE old homes and this one is just beautiful!
Glad you were able to sell it. I am sure it is a load off of your mind.
Mammograms.......haven't had that expirience yet but it doesn't seem something to look forward to....yuck!
Congratulations on selling that house! It really is lovely - for someone else! We did the big, old house thing twice and that was enough for us. Actually we did it three times. Jeremy bought a big, old house in Lancaster city, and we had to help him to get it ready for resale when he decided to move to Florida. Too much work for sure.
So glad for your mammogram result. Here are some exercises to get ready for next year:
Many women are afraid of their first mammogram, but there's no need to worry. By taking a few minutes each day for a week preceding the exam, and doing the following practice exercises, you will be totally prepared. And you can do this right in your own home!
Exercise 1:
Open your refrigerator door and insert one breast between the door and the main box. Have one of your
strongest friends slam the door shut and lean on the door for good measure. Hold that position for five seconds (while you hold your breath). Repeat again,
in case the first time wasn't effective enough.
Exercise 2:
Visit your garage at 3 am when the temperature of the cement floor is just perfect. Take off your clothes and lie comfortably on the floor with one breast wedged under the rear tire of the car. Ask a friend to slowly back the car up until your breast is sufficiently
flattened and chilled. Turn over and repeat for the other breast.
Exercise 3:
Freeze two metal bookends overnight. Strip to the waist. Invite a stranger into the room. Press the bookends against one of your breasts. Smash the
bookends together as hard as you can. Set an appointment with the stranger to meet next week and do it again!
I have read Jean's mammogram suggestions before and must say the first time I read them, I laughed all the way though it, then shared it with some co-workers and we were laughing until we cried. Good thing that only has to happen once a year!
Jean, that is hilarious and pretty much describes the experience quite well!
But have you ladies had the fun(?) of having a mammogram tech have to stretch your little boobie onto the plate? Because it's too little?? And you feel like half your body is on the plate too?? And to top it off, have her comment on how small your boob is?
Good for you having your mammo done. It's something, no matter how uncomfortable, that is SO important.
Congrats on selling the house! Hope you'll make a great commission on that one.
Congrats on the sale! And on the mammogram results! Jean's exercises are hilarious! A man definately must have come up with the way mammograms are performed. I bet if the prostate exams were that traumatic, somebody might think of a different way to do it!
Congratulations on selling the house! I remember quite awhile ago when you posted about this house. You've worked long (and hard) so I'm sure you're excited and relieved.
I'm so happy you went for the mammogram. As a breast cancer survivor, I can't stress enough the importance of getting them every year. I've read Jean's exercises before too and they're funny, but it's really not that bad...or so I've convinced myself.
Ooooo, Tracey, I love that house so congrats on finally selling it! I know that is what you real estate gals live for. I just love old homes anyway & have always wanted to own one....but, the maintenance issues would scare me away.
I just had my mamo last month, so I'm right there with ya! They aren't much fun, but at least they get them over with in a snap. I've seen those exercises jean posted before too & they are hilarious! We women can all relate to that little chore.
Rhoda
Southern Hospitality
Lynne, you had me howling a while ago. I'm so thankful my 6-year-old granddaughter is not here at the moment, as she usually is, or she'd have been running over here asking, "What's so funny, Grandma?" Now how would I have described your experience to a 6-year-old???
Congrats on the offer. That house is beautiful.
Well as for your mammogram, not yet experience the "boob squashing" as I like to call it! :) It is almost time for that and I am not looking forward to it of course! Glad to hear everything is ok! Have a great Easter Holiday.
wahooo..congratulations!! i hope you get a nice fat paycheck and can go buy yourself something really pretty...:))
p.s. I have a Yankee friend in her 80's that swears a man invented the mammogram machine...She's a feisty bird and I can not begin to tell about the contraption she dreamed up to 'examine a man'...haha
Too funny! You made me laugh with this post. Guess what? I am way past due for my mammogram, so thanks for the friendly reminder! have a Blessed Resurrection Sunday!
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