C.W.I.

Ever been in one of those impulse kinda moods where you have to do something right now?! I'm discovering that the older I get, the more I'm doing impulse things, which totally goes against every fiber of my being. I am definitely an "A" type personality, plan well in advance, make lists of lists, and I think we've all deducted that I'm a control-freak perfectionist.

A week ago I finally had a day off and had dealt with bad hair days far too long! So, I got out of the shower and thought to myself "this is it! I'm going right now, wet head and all, to get my hair cut!" So I ventured into one of those walk-in places. My first clue should have been that I was the only one there. My second clue should have been that the lady (and I use that term loosely) was slurring her words. So, I show her the picture I've been carrying around forever of Lisa Rinna's long shag, and she says "sure! I can cut it!"

Okay, so I sit in her chair, lay the picture out on her countertop, and away she goes. As I see big chunks of hair falling to the ground, I notice that she keeps stopping and examining the picture and then starts cutting again. The more she talks, the more I can smell alcohol on her breath as she proceeds to tell me that she wasn't supposed to come in until 3:00 p.m. that afternoon and the morning person didn't show up, so the manager called her to come open...blah, blah, blah. At this point I realize that when the manager called her, it must have cut her partying short and here I sit...the victim of a Cutting While Intoxicated! Hello!? Where is the Beautician's patrol or board, or whomever they answer to, when you need them?! I proceed to tell her that I think it's fine, and that's good enough... anything to get Edwina Scissorhands to STOP cutting! She goes on to tell me that she has to "even up" this one side.

Finally, she's done and I'm free to pay my $14.95 and go! I get home and try to blow dry it and realize I have no hair! Gary's comment when he got home was "what on earth did you do?"... Zack came home from school and said, "Mom, what is wrong with you? First you color your hair red, now this?!"

Oh well...it's only hair and it will grow back, right? Only one thing I've got to say, "Move over Joan Jett! You ain't got nothing on me!

"Am I Dying?"

This past weekend, Zack and I were able to go to Atlanta for a brief visit. My brother and his son had flown in from Oklahoma on Friday and were staying (until today) with Mom and Dad. Saturday evening, we all were together for dinner and had a birthday celebration for my nephew. Then, Mom wanted all of us to go in and visit with Dad together and take pictures. My older brother read some scripture and began talking about what a legacy my Dad would be leaving behind. Needless to say, we all were in tears within just a few minutes. But, we were able to pull it together and take some pictures with Dad.

Later that evening, as some family had left and others were busy doing things in other parts of the house, I was able to go in and visit with Dad alone. He said he was hungry, so I fixed him a bowl of cereal and sat and fed it to him. He would occasionally smile the biggest grin and say things like, "pretty girl" and "sweetie heart". I couldn't contain the emotion. With tears streaming down my face, I told him that I loved him and was going to miss him when he was gone. He said, "Am I dying?" Not wanting to upset him, I told him that he was just getting older and I just wanted him to know that when he is gone, I would be missing him terribly. That seemed to satisfy him. He has coherent moments and some not-so-coherent moments. There are many times when his eyes are open, but he is just not there. Sunday morning and afternoon were rough. He kept talking about war things and was very restless and agitated that he was not able to keep an eye on 'his men'. He also was in alot of pain. It's sad to see him deteriorating so quickly.

As I drove home late Sunday, his words kept echoing in my head..."am I dying?" The more I thought about it, the more I realized that more than anyone I've ever known, my father has mirrored apostle Paul's mindset on living and dying. "For to me, to live, is Christ, but to die is gain". So Dad, in answer to your question, no, you're not dying, you're gaining eternal life more abundant than any of us can ever have here on earth.

God, the Author...

It seems that every time I get in the car, the song "Unwritten" by Natasha Bedingfield is on the radio. Real upbeat tempo and catchy lyrics...I've come to really like the song. But the more I hear it and the more I sing the words, it really has made me stop and think.

Here are some of the lyrics...

I am unwritten,
Can't read my mind
I'm undefined.
I'm just beginning,
the pen's in my hand
Ending unplanned.

Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words
That you could not find.
Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin.

No one else can feel it for you,
Only you can let it in.
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins,
The rest is still unwritten...

We do wake up every day and make choices as to what we're going to do that day, words we are going to speak, whether uplifting or hurtful, attitudes we are going to have, etc. But I'm so thankful that The Author has already penned each of my days in the manuscript of my life. The pages are not blank. He knows the choices I am going to make, and although some may break His heart, He has shown His grace and mercy to me and can make good come out of the messes I create. He knows the hairs on my head and cares for me even more than He cares for the little sparrows. How great and wonderful is that?! The ending is not unplanned. For those of us that have trusted Christ as our Lord and Savior, we will live in eternity with Him.

So, as you start your day, find strength in the fact that your Father has already gone before you. If He brings you to it, He will bring you through it.

Have to brag just a little bit more...

...we just got the score sheet from Saturday's competition and Zack scored the highest out of all Drum Majors for every band in every class! I am so proud of him! The Lord has blessed us with a fine, young man who is incredibly gifted musically. I pray the Lord will use it for His glory in Zack's life now and as he chooses a career path.

My Cup Runneth Over...

Yesterday we had an all-day band competition in Phenix City, AL. It's called the Phenix City Marching Invitational and bands come from all over the southeast to compete. Our band rated a "Superior" (highest you can score) and we won "Best in Class" for our Division. Zack was even awarded "Best in Class Drum Major"!!! Gary and I were so proud of him that we couldn't fight back the tears. He has worked so hard and has been so dedicated to seeing our band succeed that we were so happy for him that it finally paid off! It was a bittersweet moment, because we were sad Nana and Papa couldn't be there to see their grandson win his first award as Drum Major. They were there in our hearts and we know she was saying many prayers for him throughout the day. Here are some photos from the event...

The last picture is of Zack and our previous drum major, Kevin (was drum major two years and is now in the Auburn band). He has been a huge influence in Zack's life and has really worked with Zack in the years he was directing our band to "prepare" him for Drum Major. He affectionately calls him "mini-me". We are so blessed to have Zack in a fantastic school that provides such a great Fine Arts program.

Before I finish this post, I wanted to give an update on my Dad. Hospice got him home on Thursday and mom said the very first night he fell out of the bed and she had to call 911. She even had a rail on one side, but has since had to get more. She said he is in pain and is not doing too well...very restless sleep, etc. All she can do is take it one day at a time and deal with whatever that day brings. Please continue to keep them in your prayers.